Silly Craft
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By the time their number had dwindled from fifty to eight, the other dwarves had begun to suspect Hungry. |
Reporter: Mr. Gandhi, what do you think of Western civilization?
Gandhi: I think it would be a good idea.
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"Bother," said the Borg, "We've assimilated Pooh." | |
Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other "Does this taste funny to you?" | |
I was trying to make a yoga pun but it was not working out. I know, I know – it's kind of a stretch. -- Jack | |
It's frog-soup night, and two frogs are thrown into a pot of water. One screams, "Help! Help! Let me out of here!". The second gasps and exclaims, "Oh my god, a talking frog!" | |
Stigler's Law of eponymy states that no scientific discovery is named after its original discoverer. Stigler himself identified the sociologist Robert K. Merton as the discoverer of this law. (-: | |
A self-addressed envelope would be addressed "Envelope". -- Steven Wright, a master of the edge of sense. | |
Isn't making a smoking section in a restaurant like making a peeing section in a swimming pool? -- George Carlin | |
What if it's unlucky to be superstitious? | |
Two termites walk into a bar. One says to the other, "Hey is the bar tender here?" | |
A little girl goes into a pet shop and asks for a wabbit. The shop keeper looks down at her, smiles and says, "Would you like a lovely fluffy little white rabbit, or a cutesy wootesy little brown rabbit?" "Actually", says the little girl, "I don't think my python would notice." | |
Two muffins are sitting in an oven, baking. One says to the other, "sure is hot in here, huh?" and the other exclaims, "Oh my god, a talking muffin! (Sounds stangely familiar?-) | |
To do is to be. - Descartes
To be is to do. - Voltaire
Doo be doo be doo. - Frank Sinatra
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A Zen monk walks up to a hotdog vendor and says "make me one with everything everything."
[that's the commonly known part - there's a lesser-known follow-on...] The monk gets the hot dog and pays with a ten. |
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My favorite tombstone:
That Which Does Not Kill You Makes You Stronger. |
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What did the guy who invented the knock-knock joke get? The No-Bell prize. -- Jack again |
Mother to the kids in the pool: Enough fighting! Each of you take one half of the pool and stay there!
Quicker-witted kid: I get the top half! |